Survey says.... lay off the porn dude.

Copy this entire list into your blog BOLD everything about you that is true. Leave plain anything that is false about you. Put an asterisk (*) at the end of false statements you would LIKE to be true.
Here goes...

I have had sex while wearing a blindfold. Uh no. I pick the ones I like to see.
I have blindfolded someone else during sex. No. But with these extra 10 lbs on me, it sounds like a good option.
I have had sex while watching porn. no. I'm not that bored with sex that I have to watch tv at the same time.
I have had sex while surfing porn on the Internet. huh? What IS it with all this porn?
I sleep better after sex. Not usually. Usually I got the wet spot.
There are some nights I cannot sleep without sex or masturbating. I'm single and not dating. If that were the case, I'd be zombie.
The bed is NOT my most favorite place to have sex. Oh yes it is.
I am turned on knowing someone is watching me masturbate. So now I'm the porn? Uh, I don't think so.
I have masturbated for someone over a web cam.I have had sex over a web cam. You can't be serious?
I will have sex with someone I just met if they turn me on. Maybe. Let's hope there's a bed nearby.
I have been tied up during sex. No way in hell.
I have had sex with someone who was tied up. So far I've not had to resort to that. They come willingly.
I have dripped wax onto a lover's body. I'm clumsy. But not that clumsy.
I have had a lover drip wax onto my body. It would be the first and last time, trust me.
I have a foot fetish.I have a leather fetish. I love shoes. Does that count? Women shoes.
I have a tickle fetish.I like being choked during sex. Oh sure, coming close to death while having sex is just soooo fun. (not)
I have had sex in a burning building. Who do you think I am? Joan of Arc?
I have erotic art on display somewhere in my residence. I've yet to find a cock that reflects that French Country theme I have going on here.
I enjoy nudie magazines. Seen one dick, pretty much seen them all.
Erotic toys are a regular part of my budget. No. The shoes take up all the extra funds.
I think PLAYBOY is tame, maybe even boring. I certainly yawn.
I have clicked on porn links in my email. Yes. Sometimes my finger hits the wrong thing.
I know the difference between girl/girl and lesbian sex in porn. What? errr.. apparently not.
I have watched more than one gay/lesbian porn video. I have watched less than one.
Much of what I know about sex comes from porn. NO thankfully I have a real sex life. Or I did once. ok twice.
Interracial sex turns me on. Running does nothing for me. (blonde head tilt)
I think we should do more to understand the cultures of sex. What cultures? It's sex. I'm pretty sure they all do it the same.
I would participate in sex research given the opportunity. What's the pay scale on that?
My current lover does not sufficiently meet my sexual needs. True. Since I don't have a current lover. But apparently all I need is some porn and a web cam......
I currently have a "crush" on someone of the same sex. Nope. Not even a little.
I have had sex at my place of employment. I rarely even work while there much less had sex.
I am often disappointed in my sexual relationships. No the sex is usually pretty good, it's the men that suck.
Some people might describe me as a nymphomaniac. hahahahahahahah. Not according to the ex hubby.
I am difficult to live with if I'm not having sex on a regular basis. No, I'm just generally difficult to live with period.
I sleep better with someone snuggled up next to me. Until they start stealing the covers or farting, or poking me in the back with their dick.
I have had sex under water. Who wants to hold their breath that long?
I have had sex in the snow. Nipply... err. too nippy.
I am in a polyamorous relationship. nope.
I have to have music playing while having sex. Have to? Why? To shut out the voices in one's head?
I have had more than ten orgasms in one night. OMG. Somebody needs to lay off the porn.
I have flashed strangers. Not intentionally.
I have given sex as a gift. and got back kids. Sex, the gift that keeps on giving.
I have set-up a three-way for my lover. Oh yea right.
I stopped during this list to have sex. Exactly what world does this list maker live in?

Help, My funny bone is broken and I can't get up

Annonymous suggests that my sense of humor is out of whack with the rest of the world.

Ahem... he's got a big head I'm thinking...... Rest of the world indeed.

Hey, I like my sense of humor. AND since this is my blog, I am keeping it. One annonymous comment does not 'the rest of the world makes..."

I'm thinking this person might have a little solider that doesn't go on maneuvers often enough.

But it does beg the question... do bloggers write for themselves, or do they write to gain favor with an audience.

I think we can already tell which one I am... My audience is one person, clapping with one hand.

Comment hound, I'm not.

It's been brought to my attention that I've not been male bashing lately!

oh Harumpf, I say. I was not male bashing.

I happen to adore men. Well in theory. I've yet to find one I adore in person. .. or even tolerate. But that's beside the point.

I was bashing adultery... not men.

I've been reading the "Unhappy" men blogs. And they're all unhappy because of sex. They suffer from lack of sex and that seems to be their deal breakers in relationships.

Mine (deal breaker) would be pet names. Specifically pet names for penises. I wonder if men really think women find it cute. We may smile, but believe me, most of the times we turn our heads and roll our eyes. Ok. We might have giggled at it when we were 15.

I for one do not find it cute to hear, "The little soldier is at attention."

"Fine dear.. Take your little soldier and go shoot something," is going to likely be my retort.

And pleas for sex using statements like "I'm horny." "Give me some." or even the "Am I going to get any tonight." As wonderfully enticing as all those sound, will fall on deaf ears accompanied by a a yawn. And if you dare suggest stiffling that yawn with Peter, Johnson, or the little soldier, you'll be sleeping on the couch.

Now THAT is male bashing.

See the difference?

Mistakes ...or OOOPS WTF was I thinking.

My fav mistake immed again last night.

I won't explain much. Just that it was typical and stoopid, what we had. Which in reality is.. we had nothing. yea... you know, same old story. I will say he wasn't married.... so it wasn't that stupid.

Actually I can't say for sure that he wasn't married. Tho I did have his phone numbers and address...but never used either. No, I never called him even though he told me to anytime. But I never did.... through all the time...and a long, long ummm long time it was.

Until one day I said to my self... self.. wtf are you doing!? this is ridiculous. And I stopped it. End of story.

I'm not a dumb woman.... I only play one when I choose to. And for a while it was what I chose. I don't anymore. I'm bored by it all.

But... lately if I knew anyone that lived in Westchester, NY..... I'd probably supply them with an address and ask them to do some recon for me..... out of curiosity.

I'd go myself, but I don't care that much....lol.

And that's all I'm saying about THAT momentary lapse into silliness.

My fav mistake

My favorite mistake im'd tonight.

Again, I kept it short, inspite of wanting to give in.

Terri and the Pope

They took the Pope's feeding tube out....

.....I don't see people screaming about that.

Why not?

Brain dead non functioning people are supposed to be kept alive forever and old sick people arent?

Why did he get to die with dignity and Terri have to be kept alive for years?

OOPS

I added Halo Scan and it deleted all the comments. As much as I want to....I'm not paying to enroll with them to get them back.

Sorry... and they were all good ones too!

"Terri Schiavo suffered brain damage in 1990 when her heart stopped briefly from a chemical imbalance believed to have been brought on by an eating disorder. Court-appointed doctors say she is in a persistent vegetative state with no hope of recovery.

Her parents and their doctors argue that she could get better ...."

It's been 15 years.... WHEN is she supposed to get better?

Give the woman some dignity in death. Don't keep her hanging on because you love her and don't want her to die. Nobody wants a love one to die. But you can't tell me this is what anyone wants for 15 years.... and perhaps 15 more.